The title of this post may throw some of you for a loop, because anger is a natural human emotion. The fact that it can be spontaneous at times is not that unusual. Many of us may feel that being victimized by bad behavior from others justifies an angry reaction that's often manifested in loud outbursts, and even threats of violence.
On the other hand, becoming angry or outraged about something that intrudes on your own sense of fairness or equity for example, without necessarily affecting you directly, can actually be considered healthy; violent reactions notwithstanding. What's at issue is not so much the onset of anger, which can be attributed to a multitude of causes, but what we should do with it when it does arrive.
In many instances some of us are inclined to use that patented excuse of, "Well, I grew up in an angry household, so I guess it's in my genes." That's about as valid as claiming you're compelled to wear something plaid every day because most of your family does, and choosing to ignore what motivates your own fashion choices. Some of us may feel we need to 'toe the line' of bad behavior having witnessed too many instances where parents, sibling, friends, or others in our social circle relied on angry outbursts as their most effective option to resolving conflict. If you feel you can't deal with your anger without first throwing a temper tantrum, then it's time for a 'reboot'.
Life Imitating Art
As a fan of cinema, I've watched many films where the most tragic characters to me are sometimes portrayed as the antagonists. They often have a dubious history that underscores their dispositions as 'disrupters' who never figured out how to deal with their own issues that impacted them in a negative way.
Their behavior would often play out as being symptomatic of their own sense of lack. In many cases they are cast as 'anti-heroes' for their moral and ethical lapses that can best be described as fluid, but whose regard for the welfare of others, surprisingly, seems directed by an underlying sense of justice that's often instrumental in 'saving the day'.
Showing up more recently within these characters though, are the frequent outbursts of anger. In a lot of cases the stories that contain these personality types are very well written and thought-provoking; if you can ignore the language and violent outbursts. It seems that particular element of the characters is simply inserted for dramatic effect. The belief of the producers must be, that the more a character is inclined to spontaneous outbursts, the more colorful it makes him or her appear to be. In some instances, after 'crunching the numbers', many screenwriters and producers probably feel that the more irreverent a character is, the bigger the box office draw.
Needless to say, it's much easier to accept the distortion of certain figures in a movie or T.V. show because it's written into their character's role, and the impact it has on the story has already been decided by the writers. Unfortunately we don't have that luxury in real life situations. The residual impact is the way these characters have helped to infect the culture to a large degree, because very little attention is often given to managing that anger in a healthy way. This caveat about the media's influence (namely movies and television) on how we deal with anger is worth mentioning, because what we experience in real world situations does seem like 'life imitating art'. As viewers begin to receive a steady diet of it, the easier it becomes to internalize, then normalize the content. As a result, strident speech coupled with violence, or the threat of violence, has become an acceptable requisite for resolving conflict in many instances.
If you're a person with a strong sense of 'self', it's easier to ignore the language and gratuitous violence and extract what good may be concealed inside a person's behavior, but some of us aren't that intuitive. Most people's response to an angry outburst designed to intimidate the other party, or parties, into submission is a defensive one that produces just the opposite effect; which is withdrawal from the situation. When I watch and listen to dialog from certain characters in a movie or T.V. show, much of it is cringe worthy because of the tense verbal exchanges and the profanity that is characteristic of them. All of it, it seems, does little to enhance the character's appeal. If I happen to experience that type of exchange between people in a real life situation, the negative impression I'm left with is magnified several times over.
Diffusing the Bomb
Just as the causes of anger may vary, the body may undergo various physiological changes as well, such as high blood pressure, headaches, high anxiety, and slowing down of the prefrontal cortex; that part of the brain which controls reasoning, and the ability to think rationally rather than acting impulsively. The over-production of the body's naturally occurring hormones like adrenaline and cortisol can also frustrate attempts at curbing the anger. If the physiological changes produced from the onset of anger become chronic, negative consequences to your overall health can start to occur. It's not unlike certain chemical elements that create a new explosive compound when mixed to the right proportions. If we are careful to make sure certain of those elements are not introduced into the mix, that compound remains stable.
We should embrace the idea of bringing that attitude into any situation that could incite an angry response; whether it involves actually interacting with someone else or not. The more we use non-threatening body language, as well as choose words that aren't offensive in nature, not spoken in an elevated tone, and don't assign blame toward the other party, then the more we open the door to meaningful dialogue that sets the stage for a peaceful resolution.
In cases where we can begin to feel anger over a particular discovery not involving another person (whether it is something that we saw, or something we may have read about), we should make it a point to take away the stimulus creating the anger, and decide to engage in activities that generate positive feelings. The human body is a wonderful creation, made in God's own image; boasting of many complex systems that allows it to function the way it was designed to. When anger is allowed to build up, it then becomes that unstable compound in need of a release. When that happens, (figuratively speaking) the resulting explosion obliterates much in its path; all that is good and needful for a healthy body, mind, and spirit to thrive.
In the book of Ephesians KJV - 4: 29 it reads, 'Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers'....
Anger that festers is like a powder keg if it's allowed to go unchecked. Becoming pro-active about taking steps to evict it from your spirit when it first shows up is a wise choice . Whenever the opportunity presents itself, decide you'll 'diffuse the bomb' before it has a chance to explode.
PEACE..
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